8 tips to build your shield of resilience

How can you become more resilient?

Improving your emotional health and building your shield of resilience is an active process that involves identifying your emotions, then shaping how you think and how you act (or refrain from acting) on those emotions. Some tips for boosting your emotional health include:

• Identify personal strengths and look for ways to make them shine. What are you good at? Are you creative? Analytical? A great cook? Natural athlete? Voracious reader? We all have strengths and weaknesses, but too often we focus on the latter and forget about the former. Think about what you’re good at, explore those areas, and experience them often.
• Learn optimism — realistically seeing the positive when faced with bad situations. This can be a hard one for some of us, especially if the glass is always half empty. (Oops.) Didn’t get that promotion? Maybe you’re not really ready; this could be a wakeup call for you to zero in on what your boss will really value from you, and then focus on improving those skills. That last date didn’t go very well? That person probably isn’t right for you; the next one could be a better fit. No matter how bad things go, most situations have a silver lining (boy, I really can’t help myself). Even if it’s just the knowledge that this, too, shall pass.

• See the good in yourself and develop a healthy self-concept. Lao Tzu, an ancient Chinese philosopher and writer, said it best: “Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.”
• Build a social network, even if it’s small. Community is important. Plan regular shared time with friends and family members. Virtual connections are good but seeing someone in person once in a while can make a big difference. We’re social animals; we need each other.

• Live life with a sense of purpose. Help others. Whether you volunteer with a local homeless shelter or simply support a friend in their time of need, you can garner a sense of purpose, foster self-worth, connect with other people, and tangibly help others, all of which can empower you to grow in resilience.
• Make time for hobbies and leisure. Do something just for you that you find enjoyable, whether it be fun and exciting, or calm and restful. You need it, and you deserve it!
• Hone resiliency, the ability to learn from and bounce back from setbacks as well as having flexibility in facing challenges. This is really the key, isn’t it? Follow the 6 tips above to make this last one a reality.

If these sound like you, take advantage of resources to help you improve your work/life balance. Employee Assistance Programs (EAPs) provide confidential support for virtually any personal or family issue, and many will also help with everyday needs such as connecting you to child or elder care resources, even dog-walking services.